I was at a party when I noticed that a girl, who was talking to friends, was watching me very closely. She looked good to me, not small and not brainless. After a while she sat down by herself and waited for me to come over and talk to her.
We talked about this and that, until I made the mistake of asking her what her name was. Don't do that again! I don't have a name. She let me try to insist that she had a name, for a few minutes anyway. And then she said:
OK! Let me show you that I don't need one and don't have one. Sit on my lap, put your arms around me, put your tongue at the back of my throat and hold it there for five minutes. It seemed like a good idea. It was a good idea. Now, she said, there are billions of people on this planet, which one and I mean only one person out of several billions have you just kissed?
You, I said. Yes, I think I understand. But why did you choose me out of all the billions of people on this planet?
Simple, you are not small and you are not brainless.
We talked some more, but at some point in the party she disappeared. I felt sad about that, but such is life. The next day in my pub I was still thinking about her.
I was ordering a beer when she bit me in the back of my neck. I had not seen her coming and how could she reach the back of my neck?
I wanna beer, and a big one, she said. We sat at a table and talked, all my mates were watching us. I've got my highest heels on, I know you think that I don't need to be taller, and I know that I'm taller than you now. But part of me now sticks out more and I think you like that. I had to agree with that.
When I went to the men's room all my mates followed me. Did they ask questions! Who is she? And that was the problem. They said several things about her that they thought were complimentary, that I can't repeat here.
We went back to my place and drank a bottle of wine and fell asleep fully clothed on the sofa. In the morning when we woke she told me to rip off her clothes as she wanted some fun. It was fun.
She did not appear to have a place of her own, she never talked about that. She was just there, sometimes, or just here or at my place or wherever I happened to be. She was a lot of fun.
She never went to bed with me, she preferred the sofa. She was odd, but I liked that some way. Where did she come from? And where did she go to?
One day I met her with her twin sister, they were identical. They hugged me. I can always tell identical twins apart, but not these two. No, she said, I am not twins. Don't worry about it! It's just a timing problem. You've got two of me this week.
I enjoyed both of her, it was even more fun. However the next week she was not to be found anywhere. A week later she was there again, just a timing problem. I asked if I would see three or four of her in the next week. She told me to shut my mouth. Listen, she said, it's embarrassing for me, not getting it right without you making jokes about it. Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't shout at you like that. And she hugged me.
I noticed that she hugged me often, always when we first met, and every few minutes when we were together. I must say that I liked that, she needed it, I needed it. In fact every time there was a need to explain or ask or talk she hugged me. And then there was no need to explain or ask or talk.
One Saturday morning I decided to take her to High Cliff in my car, it was a lovely day in summer. I don't know what I wanted to do there, but the views are good and I thought that she would like it. We sat on a bench and looked over the valley and enjoyed the sunshine and had a picnic. She asked me.
Do you want to go down there with me? You know there is no coming back?
I did. I knew that I would not be coming back. We ran down the hill and into a thick wood. I had never been there before, I could not remember having seen the wood before. We found our way between the trees and reached a big house in the middle of the wood.
There was snow on the ground. Bad timing, I asked. She nodded. We never spoke to each other again.
We entered the house, she knew it well. The house was one big area, everything soft and comfortable, no rooms, certainly no bedrooms. We walked around, I felt at home. A man and a woman appeared. They were expecting me. I thought that they were her parents. I wanted to introduce myself or that they would introduce themselves to me, but it did not happen. This was awkward, I did not know what to do. The woman realised this and came towards me and put her arms around me.
Oh, was this good! I understood the need to hug. This was their way of communication, I understood their language. I enjoyed being hugged, but more important, I now knew that hugging was our way of talking to each other. I was one of them. There was no going back.
The two of us cooked for the four of us. There was much hugging. I knew that a big question was coming. Tomorrow, she hugged.
What were we going to do? We could not take over the running of the country, some of us had already done that. Turning all the guns in the world into cutlery was too hard. A bridge over the Atlantic? A rescue mission for Bielefeld?
You know what, she hugged, we've got to get closer together and think this one out. She hugged me tighter and slid inside me.