tips for a loved one

An offcut from the Story Kettle

StoryKettle » Offcuts » tips for a loved one

Copyright © 2017, Michael M Wayman

Offer to wash ♥'s back when ♥ is in the shower.

Write ♥'s name or initial on ♥'s egg with an indelible marker before boiling the egg.

Write short notes to ♥ and leave them where ♥ will find them.

Cut ♥'s name or initial on a banana with your thumb nail before giving it to ♥. The writing on the banana will appear about a minute or two later.

Address ♥ as number one, best, favourite wife/husband or best person on this planet or better. However don't over do it.

Take ♥ late one evening with a very small suitcase for a two night stay to a certain large train station (eg. London Euston). Ask ♥ to not read the signs and not to ask questions. Board the train and sleep well – you have already bought two return tickets for a long distance sleeper service. After dawn open the window blinds and tell ♥ to say hello to eg. Scotland. Alight in a very interesting city (eg. at Edinburgh Waverley), spend a whole day sightseeing with ♥ and take the sleeper back in the evening.

If ♥ is a somnambulist tie ♥ with soft rope to yourself every bedtime.