in and around the Story Kettle 2012-2015

Contact Michael M Wayman


29 Dec 2015 – It's been two and a half years.
It's not getting any better. The sun is shining, but it's raining in my heart. It's too much. It's...

28 Dec 2015 – It's "between the years"
It's 0°C outside and it's foggy.

25 Dec 2015 – It's December.
It's 15°C outside and the daffodils are out in England.

19. Dez 2015 – Hello Ihr Beiden,
ich habe gerade alle meine Xmas-Emails geschickt, zwei Nottingham-Geschichten, einmal Deutsch, einmal Englisch. Aber Ihr habt die schon gelesen. Hier ist der originale Nottingham.

7 Dec 2015 – There are Xmas lights in the garden.
I've been busy with Mrs Tinge and Nottingham.

29. Nov 2015 – 1. Advent: Gänse­braten in Pinneberg

7 Nov 2015 – It's November.
It's 20°C outside and the first snow drops are out.

9 Okt 2015 – Biete: Mehr Zeug weg!

1 Oct 2015 – New favicon!
The favicon is the buggered little kettle that identifies this website; it appears before the address of each page and in your list of favourites/bookmarks. You may have to clear your browser cache before the new one is displayed.

15 Sept 2015 – typist's block!
The ideas are in my head, but don't reach to my finger tips.

8 August 2015 – 44°C again, banana split for lunch.

1 August 2015 – 800 pieces of content now online.
The TWENTY-part Carnival Sequence is NOT finished yet.

16 July 2015 – FOURTEEN-part Carnival Sequence is NOT finished.

4 July 2015 – v.hot today – 44°C on the patio
I have started on Brasslans again.

25 Juni 2015 – Du bist mir lieb. Ich kann nur heulen.

13 June 2015 – vote a new D&C story
All but 4 pages on this site have been improved for mobile use.

28 May 2015 – ELEVEN-part Carnival Sequence is finished.
All but 7 pages on this site have been improved for mobile use.

22 May 2015 – hamburger-style information icon on home page
This site is being renovated for smart phone users – 98% updated.

8 May 2015 – The nine-part Carnival Sequence begins with eleven
455 pages updated for mobile use.

29 April 2015 – 261 pages have been updated for mobile use – 572 to go!

21 April 2015 – 156 pages updated for mobile use

7 April 2015 – NEW FORMAT HOME PAGE

1 April 2015 – Bismarck is 200 today!

29 March 2015 – much work
I'm experimenting with CSS, viewports and HTML 4.01 strict to make the website more mobile-friendly (with a bit of pushing from Google). This means dumping the blind-table technique and editing over 800 files. This could take some time – I begin with the Brass stories.

12 March 2015 – more stories
New stuff at more Betty stories and Who am I?; I really ought to finish Brasslans; but I don't think that I will finish Colin. The central heating is working again – a new compressor motor.

10 March 2015 – Time to get out of my winter sleep!
The central heating has failed.

2 Feb 2015 – Bletchley Park and the Scharnhorst
I've found a short note about the Scharnhorst I'd written in year 2000.

1 Feb 2015 – It's snowing!
I've split the links pages into seven parts: links 1 and links 2 and links 3 and links 4 and links 5 and links 6, the newest links remain in links.

1 Jan 2015 – A Very Happy And Prosperous New Year!
I'm starting the new offcuts for the year 2015, but you can still read the old stuff:
list of all offcuts  D-J  K-Q  R-Z and offcuts 2014 and 2013 and 2012 and 2011.

18 Dec 2014 – last day for posting cards
Christmas is a very important part of our life in the western world and this year I look back at a few happy things at Christmas. I remember:
When I was very little and the very tall tree scraped the front room ceiling. Eating oranges and cracking nuts. Christmas in hospital, too weak to be unhappy; one day the ward was full of children (tonsillectomy very popular then); there was ice cream for all; but I had to say no; that taught me a lot. The wonderful dolls house my Father made for my sister, ready two days after Christmas. The school carol service each year in a different church.
Christkindlesmarkt in Nuremberg, it snowed, magic. Our first roast goose. Lying flat and eating nothing, but we recovered to celebrate New Years Eve. Inviting all the neighbouring children to decorate our tree, they all brought their parents with them. I shall be celebrating quietly and wish

A Very Merry Christmas Everyone!

Weihnachten ist ein sehr wichtiger Teil unseres Lebens in der westlichen Welt und in diesem Jahr schaue ich zurück auf ein paar schöne Dinge zu Weihnachten. Ich erinnere mich:
Als ich sehr klein war und der sehr hohe Baum kratzte die Decke. Orangen essen und Nüsse knacken. Weihnachten im Krankenhaus, zu schwach um unglücklich zu sein; eines Tages war die Station voll Kinder (Mandelentfernung damals sehr beliebt); es gab Eis für alle; aber ich musste nein sagen; damit habe ich viel gelernt. Das wunderbare Puppenhaus, das mein Vater für meine Schwester gebaut hat, fertig erst zwei Tage später. Weihnachts­lieder singen, jedes Jahr in einer anderen Kirche.
Der Christkindlesmarkt in Nürnberg; es schneite, zauberhaft. Unserer erster Gänse­braten. Auf dem Sofa liegen und nichts essen; aber wir haben uns erholt, um Silvester zu feiern. Alle Nachbarkinder eingeladen zu haben, um unseren Baum zu schmücken; sie alle haben ihre Eltern mitgebracht. Ich werde ruhig feiern und wünsche

Fröhliche Weihnachten!

14 Nov 2014 – more new stories
It took months to write schoolboy, but minutes for fit Miss Tee Vee and Mrs Tinge gets it and Betty and the Mind Police.

10 Nov 2014 – new stories
I've started a new theme:   Who am I?   is a good question to ask if you don't know, especially when every day is different, when every day you are in a different place, when every day there are different people, a new time, a new language and you have a new body.

9 Nov 2014 – time for something new
The Berlin Wall fell 25 years ago.
I won against an insurance company; avoid HDI and HDI-Gerling.
750 pieces of content are now online just for you to read.
I've finished writing Betty stories, 27 of them.

16 Oct 2014 – Heavily into Betty.
I keep writing Betty stories. As usual, Betty started as a single humorous story, but there was more, Betty is quite a character. And then along came the socwok, she wasn't happy at first, but she's in deep with Betty.

24 Sept 2014 – The sun is shining, but it's raining in my heart.
Things are getting better, but it still hurts.

24 Aug 2014 – Mrs Tinge's lovelies are blossoming.
With a name like Fiona Ismeralda Tinge what else could she do; she knew the perfect fit for underwear, she could feel it, she always did. She knew two truths about herself, that she was an expert in underwear and that she was...

19 July 2014 – Forty degrees on the terrace.
Not doing much, too hot, no energy, just small corrections.

5 July 2014 – Time to look forward.
I've finished most of the bureaucracy and have time for the garden and more Betty stories.

25 June 2014 – I have suffered a great loss,
and it still hurts.

21 June 2014 – the longest day
The weather is good, but I can't write, too sad.

29 April 2014 – Lots of new Betty stories
I keep having new ideas, the stories are in the wrong order, I must change this.

22 March 2014 – Lots of new Betty stories

5 March 2014 – Got any ideas for new stories?
If so just email me. New stories in the sequences Betty and clone and power.

26 Jan 2014 – NEW STORIES

7 Jan 2014 – 700 pieces of content on this site
Some new stuff is coming, I'm also correcting existing pages.

1 Jan 2014 – A Happy And Prosperous New Year in 2014!
There is a new offcuts page, old stuff at offcuts 2013.

28 Nov 2013 – 200 clones
I've managed to write something new, there is hope for me yet.

10 Nov 2013 – Oktober war ein schwieriger Monat!

24 Oct 2013 – Can't write!
Lots of Brasslans stories are stuck in my head, but they won't come out.

2 Oct 2013 – Mrs Happy stories
are in the frozen peas and fit Mrs Happy and Mrs Happy thinks and Mrs Happy looks back.

7 Sept 2013 – Still unable to write, but
I have started a new picture gallery, the eighth.

24 Aug 2013 – Still unable to write, but
I have added pictures to stand on my plant and ravioli has it

29 July 2013 – It is not getting any better.

25 June 2013 – I have suffered a great loss.

9 June 2013 – Usual summer writer's block,
but there are new Betty stories and granny stories.

21 May 2013 – Got any ideas for new Betty stories?
If so just email me. I'ved just uploaded the third story.

5 May 2013 – 3 new Jennffer stories
I have been writing Jennffer stories for almost three years, all 69 stories are now online.
Jennffer as a schoolgirl starts in Jennffer & the old country.
Jennffer as a young woman starts in Jennffer and the ugly plant.
The last story in German is Jennffer in Belgien  Deutch

21 April 2013 – ALL EIGHT bitch stories are online.

19. April 2013 – War im hohen Norden, wo Samstag ist Sonnabend.

30 March 2013 – There are now 62 Jennffer stories and more to come!

16 March 2013 – New bitch story the dead man and the bitch

15 March 2013 – I've got offcuts on my mind.
My offcuts are a large and growing collection of jokes, sayings, odd stuff, very short stories and miscellaneous junk. Please read the new offcuts now.

8 March 2013 – Jennffer stories are unfortunately not very popular.
There are now 56 Jennffer stories and more to come!

19 Feb 2013 – TWO NEW Jennffer stories
There are now 56 Jennffer stories and more to come!
Jennffer as a schoolgirl starts in Jennffer & the old country.
Jennffer as a young woman starts in Jennffer and the ugly plant.

17 Feb 2013 – New bitch story the bitch and the carboy

16 Feb 2013 – New multi-part story.
Life in the village of Brasslans, a new story no home and a new series.

12 Feb 2013 – Pancake Day
I've split the links page into five parts: links 1 and links 2 and links 3 and links 4, the newest links remain in links.

4 Feb 2013 – First of a new series of bitch stories.
The Bitchelan Xmas is in February.
Why don't you have a boy for Xmas? How about him over there?   the bitch and the Xmasboy
There are now 650 pieces of content on this website.

7 Jan 2013 – gift voucher is new
New pics tin cat and angel table.

30 Dec 2012 – I'm starting the new offcuts for the year 2013, but you can still read the old stuff:
list of all offcuts and offcuts 2012 and offcuts 2011 and offcuts 2010

24 Dec 2012 – TWO NEW Jennffer Xmas Stories!
Jennffer and Kandy and Jennffer and Xmas

17. Dez 2012 – Ich bin blau im Bad.
Na ja, ich habe die Wände im Bad hellblau gestrichen, mit Knauf Flächendicht.

10. Dez 2012 – Weihnachten in einem anderen Land

3 Dec 2012 – two new Xmas stories on the home page
The Curate's Christmas and Weihnachten woanders.

20 Nov 2012 – writer's block again
Usually I can't write when I have no ideas, but this time I have the ideas but lazy fingers. However after rereading D&C and Mr Brown I wrote a sequel Sargnagel.

17 Oct 2012 – who not what
If something is broken it usually gets fixed or replaced. The replacement part may be not quite the same type. What happens when part of you gets replaced with a different kind of part?

8 Oct 2012 – Sorry, but not much new stuff lately.
There are now 50 Jennffer stories.

6 Sept 2012 – To the person who keeps sending unnamed email attachments:
PLEASE DON'T! Why not use ordinary text?

5 Sept 2012 – NOW FIVE GRANNY STORIES
granny stole it and granny has a handle and granny holds on tight and granny and the sardines and granny and the postcards

20 August 2012 – First Jennffer as a young woman story
There are now 46 Jennffer stories.

11 August 2012 – The Privacy Policy is here.

6 August 2012 – Proofreading is hard work!
I have been correcting some old stories in Shorts. Quite embarrassing really, as in:
grated cheese in a small bowel.

31 July 2012 – There are now four granny stories
from granny stole it to granny and the sardines.

14 July 2012 – There are now 44 Jennffer stories
including Jennffer is happy.

30 June 2012 – Miss Davis and Miss Jones – the stories
two violent, Cuthbert and the Bishop, return of the Bishop, still violent, teeth, battered man and tlc.

Miss Davis is a gentle old lady. She likes to wear steel underwear. She is always with Miss Jones. She is a violent, homicidal thug.
Miss Jones is a gentle old lady. She likes to wear steel-reinforced underwear. She is always with Miss Davis, always. She is a violent, homicidal thug.

2 June 2012 – There are now 42 Jennffer stories
including a Henry hunk story.

19 May 2012 – Another really interesting Jennffer story is now online.
Jennffer is bad

30 April 2012 – New sitemap file in XML format for bots and crawlers.
Google gives this site a pagerank of 2 and indexes 638 from 640 content pages.

27 April 2012 – Rather silly is how to.

15 April 2012 – I'm thinking about writing an E-book.
Sorry, but at the moment nothing exciting at all.

1 April 2012 – Hay fever is a bad joke!

16 March 2012 – popular pages with adverts
KN-words and GN-words.

14 March 2012 – 38 Jennffer stories now online.
Jennffer likes both and Jennffer and the big M.

4 March 2012 – Nothing goes as planned!
I wanted to write absurd stories with humour,
but somehow I also wrote stories of love and pain.

26 Feb 2012 – Thanks to Achim and others
for links in Links and Selected Links.

25 Feb 2012 – EXCITING NEWS!
I cleaned out the gutters today!

21 Feb 2012 – Pancake Tuesday today!
with fine sugar and freshly-pressed lemon juice. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!

14. Feb 2012 – Sogar eine Jennffer-Geschichte auf Deutsch: Jennffer ist böse
Es ist widerlich Fasching und Karneval.

6 Feb 2012 – Aunty and no key
Is this the start of a new Aunty series?

28 Jan 2012 – more D&C stories
living mausoleum and picture and final sandwich.

27 Jan 2012 – slow going – but it's that time of the year
Popular at the moment are KN-words and GN-words and links and crow and duster and hanging rope.

22 Jan 2012 – over 600 pieces of content now online

9 Jan 2012 – home page and site map improved

2 Jan 2012 – scrapbook time

1 Jan 2012 – A Happy And Prosperous New Year in 2012!
This is the new contact page for 2012, old stuff is at in and around the Story Kettle 2011 2010 2009. There is a new offcuts page too, old stuff at offcuts 2011.

30 Dec 2011 – 35 Jennffer stories now online.

25 Dec 2011 – Celebrate Xmas in QWERTYIOP-Land today!
See keyboard layouts and red buttons.

24 Dec 2011 – Celebrate Xmas in QWERTZ-Land (central and eastern Europe) today.
The second granny story is new: granny stole it and granny has a handle and granny 3.

in and around the Story Kettle and in 2009-2011 and in 2007-2008